Greg Larson

Author and Copywriter

relationships

Non-Judgment Is the Most Damning Judgment

relationshipsGreg LarsonComment

The rise of mindfulness practices in the west has been good for many people's wellbeing. Meditation, yoga, and conscious breathing all bring us into the present in powerful ways.

Meditation practice, in particular, asks us to treat our thoughts (and, by extension, our selves) with neither judgment nor the urge to banish them.

For some people (like me) this results in a life-changing quieting of the mind.

However, I believe we are taking this non-judgmental aspect of mindfulness practices too far in our lives.

Ostentatious non-judgment dulls our perceptions and stifles our intuition.

I have a friend who refuses to read other people, all in the name of non-judgment.

"I don't know that person's life," she'll say, "so I can't judge them."

It's a noble effort. But the result is not-so-noble. She doesn't trust her instincts on people––especially her negative instincts––and it leads to her being taken advantage of.

Even if she gets a bad vibe, she doesn't act on it unless she knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that it's accurate.

As a result, she suffers the consequences––in work, relationships, and everywhere else.

All in the name of so-called non-judgment.

Here's the rub, though:

Prioritizing non-judgment over judgment is a judgment in itself.

The point is, quieting the self-judging mind through meditation is incredibly beneficial. But that's no reason to artificially dull your perceptions of the world.

The more you trust your instincts, the more judgmental you will be at first. But over time, as you hone your powers of perception, you will no longer be Judgmental-with-a-capital-J.

You will simply see things as they really are.

[Illustration by: https://www.behance.net/Bosatsu]